Friday, July 06, 2007

Friday the 6th

In one week is Friday the 13th. And of course you know what that means. Yup. As of right now there are only 25 days left in July. Mark your calendar.

New business.

I'm a mutant. I just don't get it. One week after the frigging iPhone is released there are still people out there screaming about deal breakers. If you're on the fence about buying an iPhone you should definitely read this post.

If you know what 3G is, and have personally experienced its blindingly fast speeds, and have access to it 24/7 – and don't mind keeping your mobile phone plugged in almost constantly or carrying around a supply of batteries everywhere you go – don't buy an iPhone. It sucks.

If you've gotten used to all those hyper-reliable, easy-to-use, world class programs that third party developers have written for Palm, BrickBerry, WinCE and Windows Mobile, don't buy an iPhone. It's shit.

Note: Please send me a list of those gnarly cool applications, so I can forward them to all my developer friends. Okay. You caught me. I don't have any developer friends. It's okay, though. You don't have any great applications either.

If you can't live without your thumb pressing two-letter combinations on dinky-shit little plastic keys. Dso alkl youtr typinfg looks likje this';. --- don't buy an iPhone. Garbage. Pure garbage.

If you were holding out for a phone that you could use to steal corporate data files, well, the frigging iPhone isn't a USB drive. In a couple of weeks 512K flash drives will be available in machines in truck stop rest rooms next to the exotic colored ribbed condoms (three quarters). Don't buy an iPhone; email all the payroll data to your house from your office, idiot. Better yet, use a pen; write peoples' social security numbers on a notepad.

If you've tried downloading music on a cellular connection you know it takes far too long to be a satisfying and enjoyable experience. Apple technology is designed to eliminate those "Feck this shit" moments. Don't buy an iPhone if you need to bitch at a logo on a piece of hardware for a software problem. Apple doesn't play that game.

MicroLimp Update
IttyBittyErectileDysfunction is going to shell out One Point Something Billion dollars to fix hardware problems with the XBox 360. A fecking BILLION. Boys and girls, I don't care how you do your math, that's a lot of simoleans. As a resident of the same State of Washington that TinySoft resides in, I really worry about the lost tax revenue that would result from them laying off a CEO.

Now I'm Serious

Really.

This link will take you to something you should read. It's time to understand what the war in Iraq is really about. Read the whole thing. If you read the whole thing and still believe the drivel in your local paper, well, okay. But read it first. If it doesn't shake you, you're not human. I had to daub my eyes before I finished it.